Matter of Principles by Dayna

Hawkins was furious as he headed for the boat house. He couldn't believe what he'd heard. How dare they treat Curran that way? What right did a bunch of bureaucratic assholes have to tell any of them how to live their lives? They weren't the ones risking their lives. They sat nice and comfy behind their desk while someone else did the dangerous shit. Now they were turning around and trying to dictate how personal time was spent. That was bullshit!

"Curran?"

Hawkins headed to the bedroom and found his lover lying on the bed staring at the ceiling. He sat down next to him and reached out a hand to touch his chest. "I just heard."

"Guess we weren't as discreet as we thought."

"Leary said they've had people following all of us. Little bastards were spying on us."

"I suppose I shouldn't be surprised."

Hawkins caressed the smooth skin under his hand. "What are we going to do?"

"I've already done it. I handed in my resignation."

"What? You're just giving in?"

Curran turned his head. "It's for the best."

Hawkins' eyes narrowed suspiciously. "What did you get in return for walking?"

Curran tried to look away but Hawkins caught his chin. "Tell me."

"They won't go after you. You will be reassigned to a new team and I get an honorable discharge. Nothing will go on either of our records about what their spies found out."

"Why? Why would they just let me off the hook?"

Curran sat up. "This wasn't about you, baby. I pissed off people who dug until they found a way to get rid of me. They could care less if you're gay or not."

"Bastards. You can't let them get away with this."

"Yes, I can. If I don't, they will expose you and they'll find a way to ruin the others too. I will not have your careers ruined because of someone's vendetta against me."

Hawkins stood to look out the window. "What are you going to do?"

"Take some time off. Then I'm not sure. Claire mentioned before about working with her."

"But the Navy is your life, Curran. You can't just give it up."

"It used to be, but I'm tired. Tired of seeing my friends dying around me. Tired of not knowing if the next time I walk out of here it may be the last time. I don't want to do it anymore. This just gives me an excuse to let it go."

Hawkins turned and saw the sincerity on his lover's face. He walked over and laid down facing the older man. "Why didn't you ever tell me?"

Curran shrugged. "I don't know. I guess I didn't want to face it myself. But I've been thinking about it since Graham died."

"What does this mean for us?"

"Nothing's changed. I love you and I want us to be together. The only thing that changes is we won't be working together any more."

Hawkins moved into Curran's arms. "And what happens when I piss off these same people? You know as well as I do that they're going to try to use their information to get me to do what they want. I refuse to be their puppet, Curran."

"I can't make that decision for you. I know they won't just forget what they've found out. But with me out of the way, I don't know what they'd do."

Hawkins leaned up on an elbow. "The first time the bastards try to blackmail me into doing something, I'm walking. I won't put up with their shit."

"I wouldn't expect you to. Just don't go looking for trouble, alright? Don't try to get back at them because I quit."

Hawkins bent down to kiss him. "I won't look for trouble, but other then that, no promises, Boss. I don't appreciate people sticking their noses into my private life."

Curran wrapped his arms around his lover. He felt the same way Hawkins did. He hated the fact that those assholes had all but forced him out of the Navy. But he wasn't going down without a fight. Yes, he was getting out of the Navy, but he wouldn't forget what they'd done. He had friends who could find the hidden skeletons in anyone's closet. And he would find the weaknesses of those who had forced him out. Then he'd turn the tables.

But he couldn't let Hawkins know about that yet. It would be better for his lover to think that he just planned to leave quietly. That's what everyone would think. Then it would be too late when they realized that they had underestimated him. Tightening his arms around the younger man, he drifted to sleep.

THE END