"I kissed JD."
Chris stopped, back stiffening ever so slightly. For a long second he forgot how to breathe.
"Really," he said, hoping for nonchalance and yet feeling anything but, and then resumed taking the eggs and orange juice out of the refrigerator. Just what he liked in the morning... a little protein, a little vitamin C... little confession. All good for body and soul. Right?
Vin was leaning against the kitchen counter, more studying his coffee mug than drinking what was in it, and then he looked up. Chris could sense Vin's eyes on him, staring, but he didn't turn.
What could he say? Who would've thought three little words could cut into him so deeply, and yet...
Shouldn't matter who Vin was kissing; wasn't like they had anything going on... at least nothing serious. Not yet. Just got together that one time... well twice if he counted that moment in the barn two days ago, though that had really just been more an accidental brush by of body parts that had left both of them smiling than anything either of them had done intentionally... not that that thought and lots of others hadn't crossed his mind... or groin... a time or two in recent weeks.
And okay, maybe he could say they had three moments together after this morning, though technically nothing really happened.
Nothing other than they kissed, that is... he and Vin. But it had been quick. Too quick... and oh yes, sidebar please judge, if the jury was seeking a ruling on that kiss... he wanted more from Vin. Much more.
But now...
Vin kissed JD.
What did that mean?
"Yeah, really," Vin was saying, answering, his finger circling around the rim of the coffee mug. "Just kinda... happened. Guess I was a little drunk."
A little drunk... as in last night drunk? Chris paused for a moment as he pulled the bacon from the 'fridge. "This happened last night?"
Vin nodded, then sighed, placed the mug on the counter and then picked it up again. "Definitely I was a little drunk."
Now Chris nodded. He gathered up the packet of bacon and half-laughed, though he really couldn't say he was feeling all too amused. Still, he and Vin had no real claim on one another... hardly had laid a hand on one another. Wasn't his place to deliver any opinions on this latest little gem of a situation, but damn he wished he had more right to Vin's life to say something in protest over him kissing JD. Instead, he rode the nonchalant rail and hoped his voice didn't sound like a train crash. "So, what'd he do?"
"JD? Didn't do anything."
He looked at Vin then, but the young man was back to staring into his empty cup.
Didn't say he kissed him back, didn't say he didn't. No further explanation was offered and now this prolonged silence was weighing over them and Chris just had that feeling that a whole hell of a lot more was not being said here. But what could he say? He looked over at Vin whose eyes were still buried deeply in the bottom of his mug as though coffee-stained ceramic held the most fascinating of secrets.
Christ, the silence was deafening. Vin kissed JD... had told him about it. He ought to say something...
And then Vin sighed... a sound that fit vaguely, no, exactly, like he himself was feeling. And then he didn't have to think of what to say as Vin began to explain.
"Not sure how it happened, exactly."
"Oh." Okay, well not exactly profound, Larabee, but better than all that silence. He wanted to know... and then suddenly he really didn't. He felt no desire to hear any more about it... not about Vin and JD. Vin and anybody. He really only wanted to think about Vin kissing him.
"Chris..."
Breakfast, right. Vin had come out to visit that animal of his and have breakfast with him this morning, so food... he could deal with food. Plates, cups, forks... What was he forgetting? Oh yeah, butter. Maybe cut up some cantaloupe, have some toast with his JD...
Jesus.
"Chris."
He stood from where he crouched in front of the refrigerator and turned quickly. Too quickly. "What?" Now that sounded anything but relaxed and nonchalant.
Vin had moved, was now standing behind him... right behind him... and he turned and suddenly found himself trying not to drown in the searing blue depths of the man's eyes.
"It didn't mean anything, Chris, that's why I told ya. It just happened... doesn't matter. Wasn't anything. Ain't like I'm interested in him... an' I sure don't think he's interested in me. Don't know where it came from, just kinda... happened."
Vin was staring at him, eyes serious, head tilted at just that same angle he used when he was waiting for something more... and actually, Chris thought, the same angle as when he was waiting for a kiss, maybe?
Or maybe not. He turned his attention back to the counter. Chickenshit.
"So, JD didn't hit you?"
Vin laughed then. Jesus, did he think this was funny?
"Think JD might've been testing some sort'a waters or something. I dunno. But no, he didn't exactly hit me."
Testing the waters. Well didn't he just jump right on into the deep end, eyes and fucking lips wide open, Chris thought. He was scowling, he could feel himself scowling... he couldn't help it, and then it dawned on him...
He was feeling jealous. God, he was!
Vin moved away. "I just thought... just figured maybe I ought'a say something, case it came up later today at Buck 'n' JD's is all. Whole thing don't matter... was just a little kiss. It was all kind'a weird, really."
"Okay." Okay... great. What a stunning vocabulary. And no, it was not okay... not okay at all, but what the hell was he supposed to say? Couldn't think of a thing to say.
Vin went on, though. "I'm tellin' you 'cause I wanted you to know, Chris. I kissed him, yeah... but... it... it just made me think 'a comin' here." He put down the mug again, Chris watched as his hand placed it on the counter. "To see you."
Chris frowned. Kissing JD yet thinking of him... How the hell does that happen? How the hell do you travel from kissing Dunne to wanting him?
Vin's arms came up to wrap around him from behind and Chris relished the warmth of that body pressed against his back and leaned slightly backward into him. This was what he wanted, what he yearned for... Don't matter, Vin had said. Maybe it didn't.
He'd have to forget it happened, but it was hard now the picture was planted in his brain. A quick flash of Vin kissing JD snapped off in his mind and he groaned softly. Vin squeezed him tighter which prompted him to groan again, though a whole different sound of desperation for that embrace seemed to ring in his own ears.
He sighed. He was jealous.
Though he'd like to think he might, God knew he wanted to... but really, he knew he had no real claim on this man.
And so he sighed and relished the feel of having Vin so close that paper would be hard-pressed to come between them. It felt... amazing. "It's okay, Vin, you're right. Doesn't matter," he told him.
Though it did. God it did.
"I kissed Vin."
"What?"
God he didn't really want to say it again. He inhaled... "Vin. I... I kissed him."
Buck looked stunned, which was probably a fair and appropriate reaction. JD felt pretty much stunned about the whole thing as well.
"When?" Buck asked.
He sighed. "Last night."
"Where?"
Another sigh and suddenly JD thought he couldn't get any more uncomfortable than he was at that moment... except maybe the moment right after he'd kissed Vin. He glared at Buck and pointed to his lips. "Here, on the mouth." Damnit, if Buck so much as laughs...
"No," Buck said between the tiniest of chuckles which still were enough to annoy the crap out of him. "I mean, where were you when this happened?"
"Inez's."
"Inez's... last night? Well, where the hell was I?"
"You'd already left... and what the hell difference does that make where you were? You wanted to watch or something?" Oh hell, strike that. Like Buck hadn't made it clear enough he'd love to be a fly on the wall to view whatever it was Vin and Chris were doing... and they all were pretty sure they were doing something.
And oh, Jeeze... Chris. He hadn't thought of Chris. Would Vin tell Chris? Would Chris kill him?
Buck was laughing still... or was that snickering.
"You think this is funny?" JD snarled, because it was certainly not funny, not funny at all... not at all. Why had he done it? What had made him kiss Vin?
Buck sobered. "Nah, not funny. What... what did he do, when you kissed him, I mean?"
Do?
"I didn't... he didn't do anything. Tell ya the truth, Buck, it surprised me... think it surprised the hell out of Vin, too." Truthfully, Vin had looked downright shocked there for a moment, that was for damn sure... but then JD was pretty sure Vin looked a bit excited, too, and that scared him a little 'cause he had certainly felt a strange twinge of excitement running through his own nerves as well. But he really hadn't meant to kiss Vin.
How did this happen?
And what the heck kind of expression was that on Buck's face?
"So, did he kiss ya back, JD? Vin, I mean?"
"I know ya mean Vin... who else would you mean? What, you think I go 'round kissing all sorts 'a men in bars on a regular basis? 'Cause I don't you know... this was just an... a... oh, I don't know what it was." And how dumb did all that sound. It had been just a freak accident that he brushed up against Vin at the exact time someone bumped into Vin who bumped into him and then their mouths were less than inches apart and... and...
He hadn't really meant to do it, had he? God, he could hardly remember... the whole episode had stunned him to the point of being completely, physically frozen like a statue made of ice, just waiting for some sort of warm thaw that was never coming. Except it did come...
That kissing part... that had been a coil of smoldering hot fire slowly radiating heat deep into his belly, high up into his chest... down to his hardening...
Whoa! What the hell was happening here?
"Buck," he said, choking back what felt like the first strains of a nauseous fit as he registered those same strange stirrings his body shouldn't be having when thinking about...
Vin.
"Oh God, I kissed Vin."
He sounded pathetic... knew he did yet couldn't help himself and looked up, hoping Buck had the decency not to be grinning that lecherous grin he would plaster over his face when he decided something was really just too tasty to let fade away unnoticed.
This was fucking serious and JD needed some answers from someone who might have a clue about things like this. "I'm... " he held his head and tried to explain how he felt about it... and how did he feel, anyway? "I'm... God, I'm gettin' a headache. What the hell's wrong with me?"
"Okay JD," Buck began, his voice filled with enough warmth of sincerity JD felt a bit calmer. "First off, let's get to the bottom of this... Why did you kiss Vin?"
He sighed. "I don't know."
"Well, why do you think you did?"
"I don't know."
"Do you have any idea why you might've wanted to?"
"Didn't I just say I don't know?"
"Okay, fine. Don't have t' get testy... I'm just tryin' to help you out here. So, did you want to kiss him?"
Did he? "No, I never... I didn't..." He sat down hard, blew out a deep breath. Maybe he did. "Hell, Buck. I just really..."
"Don't know," Buck finished.
Obviously there was a definite pattern forming here.
"Jeeze, Buck. I really don't know. I didn't set out to do this if that's what you're asking. It just happened... all by itself. Kinda." And that was the truth... sorta.
"Well now, JD, it didn't just happen all by itself. You did have to make some sort of move or..."
"Oh, hey... don't say it like that." He stood up, bumping his hip on the corner of the table yet feeling nothing but anxious the more he talked this out with Buck. "I didn't put any moves on him... on Vin. No moves... God, I'm not like that, y' know."
Buck was staring at him like he had two heads. "Like what?"
"You know... that way."
"What way?"
He sighed. Was Buck doing this on purpose? He squinted his eyes. "You know what I mean..."
And then Buck grinned softly. "You mean gay."
JD rolled his eyes. "Yeah, gay. I'm not."
"So maybe it was Vin who really made the move."
"There were no moves, I told you it just happened. Besides, Vin's not gay."
"JD..."
"He's not! Vin's not! I know he likes Chris and all... spends an awful lot of time with him and we joke about it and everything, but that's different. That's just something 'tween the two of them, doesn't mean they're gay! Chris was married, you knew his wife, you know he isn't gay! And Vin, he..."
"JD..."
He held up a palm, stopping Buck from saying another word. "I know what you're going to say... but what about Charlotte, Buck? What about Vin and Charlotte? What was that?"
"She was married, JD."
"I know that... that's not the point! He was with her... wanted to be with her so badly he almost left Denver and us for her. And she's a girl! Right? If he was gonna run off with someone and that someone is a girl, then that has to count for something! And she was awfully pretty, you know."
Buck laughed. "Yeah well... hell, some would say Vin is awfully pretty."
JD felt his mouth fall open. "I never said I thought he was pretty!"
"I wasn't talkin' about you, JD, calm down. I was just saying, as men go, Vin ain't all that bad a choice to try on for a kiss."
JD groaned. "You are not helping me."
It hadn't been a secret that Vin and the very married Charlotte Richmond had been having some sort of relationship... and definitely not just platonic. If Vin was really gay, why would he want to be with her?
All of which explained nothing about the matter at hand, though.
Buck leaned back in his chair and interlocked his fingers across his stomach. "I'm just saying, if you wanted to explore that side of yourself, Vin's a good one to pick."
"What side? There are no sides. I have no sides... and whaddaya mean explore?" He loosed a soft gasp. "Was that what I was doing?" God, could it have been? That deep down, he wanted to find out what kissing a man was all about? Did he have a side to him that he'd never known about before now? "Buck?" Oh God, could he say this? "Do... do you think I might be... gay?" He couldn't have whispered that word any softer than that, and still it made him cringe to hear it out loud.
Buck was staring at him. Why did the man's eyes have to twinkle like that?
The corner of Buck's mustache raised the tiniest bit. "Do you think you're gay, JD?"
He looked up, felt something akin to guilt fill his eyes though he wasn't sure what he had to feel guilty about... except... "I think maybe I wanted to kiss Vin before, Buck. Before last night, I mean."
And then Buck did laugh. "Hell, JD. Who doesn't want to kiss Vin... at least once."
Now he really was confused. "But..."
Buck was shaking his head. "You kissed him spur of the moment, JD. You thought you wanted to see what that was all about, maybe, and there was Vin looking good as always... Who knows? Just like Vin thought he wanted Charlotte. He was being young and curious... and stupid, maybe. I'm sure you can relate."
"Oh, thanks a lot." Curious, though. That was okay, he guessed. And curiosity never hurt anybody...
Buck was going on. "Besides, I've always thought that whole nightmare with Charlotte was brought on by the fact Chris was being chased by Mary Travis at the time. I think ol' Vin just needed a distraction."
Yeah, JD thought. Maybe.
Mrs. Travis was hot and heavy for Chris... and boy, had that been an ugly couple of months. They'd all speculated that Vin was just waiting in the wings to see which way the pieces of all that would fall, maybe hoping to be part of the glue that patched Chris back together after the woman was done trailing after him... and talk about patching. JD shuddered to think of all that Vin and Chris might have done. And then there was the whole Charlotte Richmond episode. Vin had seemed totally smitten with his new distraction while Chris ran from Mary.
Could he relate? "Is that what you think I needed... a distraction that turned into Vin?"
Buck sighed. "I should be so distracted."
"Buck!"
"Hell, JD. I don't know... but if this is the first time it ever occurred to you to kiss a man, and you've not been attracted before, I wouldn't worry about you being labeled anything but curious... though you know," Buck continued, using that tone he took when explaining something he thought he considered himself to be expert upon... a tone that usually made JD feel like some sort of moron, "there is such a thing as being bisexual, JD. Vin likes women... likes men. Maybe you..."
"No." Not exactly news about Vin, JD conceded, though sure wasn't exactly what he wanted to hear about himself. It did somewhat explain what he was pretty sure Chris and Vin were doing together, though. "Okay, so maybe Vin likes men and women... but I don't. 'Least, I never did before. So... why'd I... you know..."
"Kiss Vin?"
"Yeah... kiss him."
"Well, JD, maybe all 'a sudden your curiosity acted up and there came Vin, looking too damned pretty to resist." Buck's eyebrows waggled suggestively. "Here's a thought... maybe you and he could re-enact the whole scene right here tonight... might give me better insight to the hows and whys of it and I wouldn't mind watching what..."
That was it for JD. He stood and headed toward his room, done with the whole conversation. "Okay, y' know what? Forget it. Forget I even told you any of this. Don't help me, Buck, just... just shut up. Okay?"
"Fine," Buck agreed with a grin, calling after his departing roommate. "I'll shut up about this... if you fill in the blanks of what exactly happened."
JD stopped and hung his head.
"Details, JD," Buck called. "I want details."
It had been a long week, 5:00 Friday coming all too slow as far as Team 7 was concerned. Ducking out early to make happy hour at the Saloon was on everyone's mind, and watching as that minute hand finally ticked from 4:59 to 5:00 was pure agony in the waiting.
Then later, multi-pitchers of beer later, they were all relaxed, sated and well on their way to calling it a successful night.
Well, almost all.
Chris had bailed out even before they started claiming he had way too much paperwork to finish and no desire to come in over the weekend... all of which was disgustingly true and yet none of them bothered to feel too guilty over the fact they were leaving him behind...
And Nathan had bade them farewell at the elevator as he professed a greater interest in shacking up with his fiancé, Rain, for the evening instead of immersing himself in their soon to be feelin' no pain company.
They'd all waved their goodbyes and then shoved themselves as one into the next available elevator and headed straight to the bar.
And those several pitchers of beer later... much later...
JD remembered slightly weaving his way toward the bathroom. It wasn't he was too drunk to walk, though he knew for a fact he was too drunk to drive, and luckily Josiah graciously kept a controlled lid on this own imbibing and had offered whoever remained... that being JD and Vin... a ride back to their respective places.
JD couldn't have been happier. He was ready to leave. He was tired, and all night long he'd kept wary watch over the comings and goings of those in and out of the door... the young Ms. Casey Wells being his first and foremost thought. Yet the young college senior hadn't shown like he'd hoped she might. Like she'd told him she most likely would.
Damn.
He finally gave up on her appearing, thinking maybe he ought'a give up altogether on someone who still was in school... and then telling himself all the while as he'd made his way down the long hallway toward the bathroom that she was just running late... really, really, really late. He wondered where she might have gone, and with whom. She was driving him crazy...
She was driving him to distraction.
He'd done what he had to do with a huge sigh of relief from the reduced bladder pressure, washed up and then headed back toward the bar area.
Maybe she was there now, sitting with her friends...
Maybe not. Why hadn't she showed?
He hadn't noticed Vin heading toward him at first, his mind filled with shifting visions of Casey as he'd slowly returned from the bathroom... and then he looked up and caught sight of him and stopped.
Music tickled his ears and he half registered the faint sound of a blues guitar that just seemed to fit the way Vin eased his way down the hall. He'd never noticed how fluidly Vin's body moved.
"Vin," he said and smiled and thought Vin looked as blitzed as he'd ever seen him... no surprise, really that he'd ingested a few more than usual given the last several weeks. An unusually tough assignment that had drained everybody pretty much dry, followed by several grueling days of meetings, forms, paperwork, more debriefings... they'd all felt tightly wound.
He suddenly wondered how Vin might usually release all that pent up stress. Vin wasn't usually a big drinker, so...
Maybe he unwound with Chris?
He smiled again as Vin smiled and moved to pass by... and funny how he'd never noticed how perfectly white Vin's teeth were, how when he smiled they showed nicely bright in contrast to the tan the man almost always had... and then somehow they stumbled right into one another, his body falling not so gently against Vin who shifted and fell against the dark wood paneling of the small hallway.
And the only place to brace his hand for leverage, lest he fall, was Vin's chest.
What happened next and in what order he couldn't quite remember.
He remembered thinking Vin's eyes were just so large and dark... though they looked somehow glazed over too, making it abundantly clear that he'd had his fair share of drink... whiskey with beer chasers, JD thought, though not sure why that mattered and not sure if that really had been Vin drinking them or Buck.
And then it really didn't matter anyway who had what to drink, because what happened next really couldn't be blamed on anything but timing...
Right place, wrong time?
Wrong place, right time?
Maybe just wrong, wrong, wrong?
There had been a sort of pause, where the lights dimmed and that bluesy music filled his head... and then Vin's weight shifted, bringing him closer to JD's slightly shorter stature...
And then JD was staring up into the bluest damned eyes he'd seen in his whole entire life...
He inhaled.
And exhaled.
Vin's hair smelled a bit bitter from the cigarette smoke from the bar... and yet smelled clean, too, like he'd stepped straight from his shower...
And then suddenly that brought on the image of Vin standing there, naked as the day he was born, his fingers massaging into his own long, silky mane of hair and then...
Jesus, and then out of nowhere, JD found his own hands entwined deeply into Vin's hair, twirling it around his fingers, and he pulled that exquisite face toward him... Vin really was one good-looking man, pretty almost, beautiful... and he smiled as those pale, full lips descended down to his and oh, God, he wanted to feel that hair brush against his face...
Who was kissing who here?
A pair of hands gently, though firmly, framed his face and the softest of lips descended onto his.
Oh Jesus, Vin's lips.
Oh, Jesus... he was kissing Vin!
Oh, Jeeze...
He opened his eyes... and wait just a minute... when had he closed them and more importantly, why... and found himself mere inches, less than mere inches, next to Vin.
He was kissing Vin!
He let his tongue press softly against Vin's' mouth, felt no resistance and so probed forward... and then the softest of tongues pressed to his and pushed and he tentatively let it slip into his own opening mouth... and then it filled him, exploring the inner reaches... delving deeper... and oh God, oh God...
What was he doing!
He was kissing Vin!
Kissing him!
He sure as hell hadn't planned it. He hadn't lied... wouldn't willingly do anything to mess up his chance with Chris.
Oh, please, God, don't have him fuck that up before it even began.
He had to apologize to JD. How the hell had this happened?
He'd been heading to the bathroom... had definitely had more to drink than he'd planned, and all that time pouring whiskey into his glass had wished like hell that Chris would've just come through that door. Just walked right on in and there he'd stand, with the bar's dimmed lighting illuminating his outline as he'd scan the room...
Looking for him.
And so he kept thinking of him all night. Of Chris.
All of him.
More than just the physical Chris... though hell if that wasn't something based from perfection, that ass in those black jeans...
But he was attracted to the man as a person as well. All of which could be dangerous... was dangerous, considering the man was his superior... his boss.
But glass after glass throughout the night hadn't seemed to matter as Chris hadn't walked through that door... and that made the longing for him swell up to the surface and leave him hungry and aching.
Then, just as he'd resigned himself to the fact that Chris was in no way going to show, he'd headed back to the bathroom, having to go one more time before he went home and feeling a damned good buzz that seemed to lead straight to his crotch... when...
JD appeared out of nowhere.
JD.
JD standing there with his bright eyes, his hair impossibly dark and falling as ever over his forehead. He'd always thought JD's skin looked as soft as he'd ever seen...
And later, he couldn't think why he'd done it, or how it had happened... it just did. Someone had bumped into him...
They'd sort of fallen into one another, suddenly a mass of tangled limbs, he could feel JD's breath on his cheek... JD had the longest, darkest eyelashes...
And then somehow...
He was kissing JD... it was a damned miracle JD didn't deck him right then and there.
And then...
JD was kissing him.
Now that was a shock... though he couldn't say he hadn't enjoyed it while it happened...
But all in all, JD wasn't Chris.
And he wanted Chris... badly.
They'd parted then, he and JD, both pulling away gently... and thank God in Heaven for whatever miracle was bestowed upon them that no one they knew came traipsing to or from the bathroom during those few minutes.
"JD," he remembered saying, "I don't..."
And then JD seemed to glow a bright red, cheeks flushed with embarrassment. Vin knew, since his own face surely and completely mirrored that same look.
JD hadn't said anything, just looked at him and then stammered, "I uh... gotta go, Vin. Got something..."
With that, and a double-take last look, he'd left.
Okay, driving home after drinking wasn't the smartest idea in the world, he knew, but kissing one of his teammates pretty much had brought a strange reality slamming back to him, and he was suddenly more than sobered. He'd left quickly, knew he was damned lucky as hell he'd gotten home in one piece, too. Really, he should have let Josiah drive him home, but...
Jesus.
He'd kissed Vin.
And then Vin had kissed back.
As he'd put his key in the lock and flipped on the lights to the safe reality of home, he couldn't stop thinking about it... and if he could crawl out of his skin he would, because the worst part of it was...
It hadn't been all too awful. Unexpected, yes. Unrequested... well it was as much a surprise to himself as it was to Vin that it had happened...
Unrequited?
He smacked his forehead. Jesus, JD, what the hell you thinking! It was Vin, for crying out loud!
Vin his friend. Vin his coworker.
Vin who maybe liked boys as much as girls...
And he kissed him. Kissed Vin.
And he liked it.
What would Casey think?
What would Buck think?
Oh God, what would Vin think!
"So now I've told you, what do I do?"
Buck thought a moment, then grinned. "Well, I know what I'd do..."
"Buck!" This was no good, he couldn't have this conversation with someone who felt about sex the way others felt about eating... tasty, necessary and at least three times a day. "I knew I shouldn't have told you."
"Oh, JD, hell, I'm just kidding. Listen, you don't need to do anything 'far as I can see... unless you think you want to do something more about it."
He didn't really, did he? "No," he said. Was that reassuring enough? Did he really believe himself? "But... Chris and Vin. They'll be here soon and I'm not sure what to say..."
"Well there'll be quite a few people here, JD, including Casey, remember. I figure you can do one of two things. Either ignore it and hope it all goes away and assume Vin feels the same and chalks it up to being a moment of temporary insanity on your part, or..."
"This is the part that scares me."
"Or, you can ask him if it meant anything to him that you kissed him and go from there if there's anywhere further you think you want to take that kiss. But I wouldn't recommend bringing any of it up in front of Casey... or worse, Chris." He paused, rubbing his mustache. "'Specially Chris. Pretty sure something more'n kissing's going on there."
JD thought so too. "Yeah. That's why this is so..."
"Awkward."
"Yeah," he agreed. Not to mention deadly... having a pissed off Larabee at his back shooting that sharp glare at him with twin ice-green daggers wasn't too thrilling an idea.
Ignore it and it will all go away... that could work. Couldn't it?
"Chris?" Leave it to Larabee to say he's not bothered by something and then get all tight lipped... in more ways than one. No hint of stealing a kiss from Chris right now.
Ever since he'd made the mistake of telling him he'd kissed JD.
It had been an accident of sorts... hadn't planned to fall toward him. Hadn't planned on their lips ending up so close together after that fall... hadn't planned on kissing him and sure as shit hadn't planned on JD kissing him back, either.
Weird...
But in a nice way, though hell if he'd say anything like that to Chris. Chris said he wasn't bothered by the whole thing, and at first Vin believed him. But now he'd been even more closed-mouthed than ever all day long and it was driving Vin crazy. Just when he'd thought things were moving forward between them. They'd kissed, had a few quick gropes, a few really nice body presses. He wanted more, so much more, and it had taken so damned long to get to this point...
Shit. He never should have said anything about kissing JD, never.
He sighed. Nice to have to start all the way back to square one because all of a sudden Chris finds JD some sort of threat. What was he thinking saying anything about it?
He sighed and shot a glance to Chris who staring straight ahead as he drove, his eyes never leaving the road. Chris hadn't answered him, most likely hadn't even heard him call his name and he didn't bother repeating himself.
Guilt was why he'd told him. Guilt over stealing a moment with JD that should have been a moment with Chris. Thing was, though, if he hadn't said anything, sure as shit JD would've let something slip and then things with Chris would've been even more strained than right now. He vaguely wondered if Buck knew.
And he felt guilt, too, because all in all he really did like JD... a few months ago might have even pushed for something more than just that kiss if JD had been interested. It was that part of him that had suddenly showed up last night to slip a tongue down JD's throat.
But now, he had no true desire to act on that urge. Not now. Because of Chris.
He'd never met anyone quite like Chris... and he liked that. Was pretty sure Chris felt the same about him... fairly sure, anyway. Sure, that was, until he told him of kissing JD.
He glanced to him now as they pulled into the parking area outside Buck and JD's shared townhouse. Chris cut off the engine and just sat staring out the windshield at the warm glow of light coming from the house.
Vin sighed again. Now things were getting all strained. Damn. "Plannin' on goin' inside, or we just gonna sit here for the night?"
That seemed to spur a thought in Chris as the man's eyebrows drew down... meant he was thinking again... or maybe he'd been thinking too much. Vin figured neither was a good thing.
Chris turned to look at him, his eyes like green glass... shiny, hard, sharp, piercing him deeply. And then they seemed to soften, their surface falling to shadow as he shuttered them away and pulled back into the recesses of the car's shadowy interior. "We're goin' in," he said abruptly and pulled the keys from the ignition as he got out of the truck.
Vin followed, several six-packs in hand which he delivered to the kitchen after calling out his greeting to the others settled in the living room. Hell, if he'd known Chris was going to take it all so hard he for sure would never have said anything in the first place.
Still, it seemed like the right thing to do... to tell Chris. Not that kissing JD was such a big deal, but because he was finding himself more and more drawn to Chris with each passing day, and was hoping something might spur this, whatever this was between them, into action... and he hated the thought that it might hurt Chris if somehow it would have come out that he'd kissed JD last night.
Chris was definitely bothered by knowing, though. Vin knew Chris was attracted to him... had proof of that. Just not enough. Not nearly enough.
Chris watched Vin walk to the kitchen, his eyes lingering on that denim-covered ass. Figured Vin'd have to wear that particular pair of worn jeans tonight, the ones that fit him like second skin. The ones that outlined every fine feature of the man's physical assets.
He'd nodded to Buck and the others as he and Vin had entered, then leaned for a few minutes against the wall in the back of the room, looking at, but not really seeing what they were watching on television. Buck gave him a nod and awfully wide grin, and he wondered if JD had confided anything.
Again, the image of Vin kissing JD flashed before his eyes and he felt himself scowl. This was going to drive him crazy.
With a shove off the wall he headed to the kitchen, to Vin, at the last second catching Buck's not so subtle wink.
Definitely Buck knew something.
He placed the beer on the counter, snagging a bottle and opener and popping off the top of a longneck. Several deep chugs of the icy liquid slid down his throat... felt nice. Nicer were the hands that seemed to appear out of nowhere to wrap his waist. A hard body pressed up against his.
"Chris," he pretty much moaned... soft enough for Chris to hear but not enough to attract anyone's attention from the other room... not that they would. He and Chris had been listening to the game on the radio on the way over... it had filled the otherwise silent truck and was exciting enough for those watching to want to stay glued to the TV.
"Shhh," Chris breathed in his ear.
Lord that made him hard, hearing that voice sound so strong, so sure and so damned close. Chris's breath was hot against his neck. His hair lightly stirred from the exhalation.
He was getting hard. Too hard for here.
"Chris," he said again as a warning and turned in the man's arms. His back was pressed to the counter now, and in one move he pulled himself up to sitting. Chris remained between his legs, the front of his lower body pressed to the cabinets, his upper body pressed as close as Vin figured he could get without actually climbing up on top of him.
"Hell," Vin said, half-grinning as he took another swig of beer. "Now you want some."
Chris stared at him for a moment, and then grinned too. "Oh, I've always wanted some." His hands slid up the outside of Vin's upper thighs. "Now I just want some more."
Vin thrilled as those hands moved with authority to caress his hips, his ass. He shifted to allow them access under him, then sat right on top of them as they complied, pinning each underneath.
For a long moment they both stared at one other, each knowing that now wasn't anywhere near the right place or time... Vin half wondering why Chris chose here and now to press forward.
Chris pulled a hand free and took hold of Vin's beer, downing a third of it, all the while never relinquishing the gaze he'd set on Vin's face.
Excitin' as hell, Vin thought and ran his tongue around his lips, licking the tiny droplets of beer from them as he watched Chris's mouth work that bottle.
"You kissed JD," Chris said softly.
Vin stared at him, then dropped his head as he nodded. "Yeah." He felt Chris pull his other hand out from under him. A long span of silence passed. Vin felt his stomach clench, and then...
"Kiss me," Chris more breathed than spoke.
Vin wasn't sure he'd heard the words, and then...
The bottle was set down, he heard its faint clink on the counter and then two hands gently ran light, caressing paths over his face, down his neck...
Hands dropped to his waist and he was gripped firmly, fingers almost pinching as they pulled him forward in a hard yank. He and Chris now pressed tightly together, and he wrapped his legs around Chris's hips and reeled him in as well, shifting and closing what air space was left between them.
Chris kissed him...
And he kissed Chris.
They never saw JD standing at the door.
He'd heard Vin and Chris arrive, though they hadn't called out a welcome... not that it mattered. Plenty of others greeted both men and JD made his way slowly down the stairs, peering into the hallway just as Vin was making his way to the kitchen, beer in hand...
And so he waited a few minutes as he collected his thoughts, then followed. Figured he ought to offer up some sort of apology, some lame explanation... say something that would break whatever ice might be surrounding them after that kiss.
That kiss. Their kiss.
Not this kiss...
They were kissing.
He hadn't realized Chris had followed Vin into the kitchen, and now he was staring at them, his stomach turning over.
Chris was sliding between Vin's thighs as they pressed to one another, Vin's denim encased legs were wrapped tightly around Chris's ass. They couldn't get any closer if they tried... and God, how they tried.
Oh yeah, Buck... something was sure going on, right here in the kitchen...
They were kissing. Were still kissing.
He stood mesmerized, staring, his hand gripping the door's handle in a white-knuckled clench, his tongue bathing his own lips as it mimicked their same, slow rhythm.
Oh God!
He didn't realize how he would feel seeing them.
Didn't realize just how much he'd want to be running his fingers through that silken hair...
Didn't realize just how much he wanted to be standing where Chris was standing... breathing him in, wrapping arms around, pressing groin to groin, mouth to mouth...
Kissing Vin.
THE END