Artwork by Sonia
Five years it had been now. Five years since Sarah and Adam died. Since he came back to his home and found it gone, gone up in flames, with his family gone as well. Five years since he had lost everything that made his life worth living.
Chris Larabee stood by the two graves, the burnt out shell of his former home behind him. He looked at the names on the simple wooden crosses and felt the tears start. He had only visited this place once since he had buried the bodies of his wife and son in those graves. That was on the hunt for their killers. It had been hard to come back then and he hadn't since.
Nausea came up just thinking about those badly burned bodies and he had to look away for a moment. But he collected himself again. Being here, with his family, on this day had become important to him in the last couple of weeks, had become something he felt he had to do.
Because five years, that meant something. So, here he was. Not to seek revenge, but to remember, to show them that he hadn't forgotten them. "I need to remember", he whispered to the wooden crosses, to himself. "I need to remember you both. You were my life!"
A soft rustle behind him made him lift his head and wipe his eyes surreptitiously. He felt a hand on his shoulder. "Y'okay, Cowboy?" a soft, Texan drawl asked him. Chris nodded almost imperceptibly, but it was enough for the hand to withdraw again. He took a deep breath and then turned around to face his best friend, Vin Tanner.
"Yeah, I guess I am allright, in a way", he said softly. "Come on, let's do this."
Chris turned towards Pony and to something that was bound behind his saddle. It was a small, no, two small trees, totally entwined amongst each other. One was bigger than the other and seemed to try and shelter the smaller one. Chris had found them a few months ago near his cabin. Those two small entwined trees had touched him and he had left them in peace. And he had remembered them when he felt the need to commemorate in some way the fact that Sarah and Adam had died five years ago, that it had been five years since they had been taken from him and his life had shattered.
He didn't fully understand it himself, but in a way his need to commemorate them came from the fact that slowly, but surely he had found a new home again, a new family. Five men he called friends, one who was more, who was a brother and who had accompanied him today. He wasn't alone anymore and he had come to life again. It was something he felt he needed to tell his wife and son. And then he had thought about those two trees.
The two young trees were a symbol of life and they also reminded him of the two people he had loved more than anything in the world and who now lay side by side, together, on this peace of land. So he had very carefully dug the small saplings out of the ground to bring them here, on this day.
Chris and Vin took them carefully from Pony's back and brought them over to the two graves. Chris knelt behind the crosses and with his bare hands he dug a hole to plant the saplings. He felt a strong need to do this with his hands, to feel the soil in which his family rested. And to do this alone. Vin understood and had stepped back, but he was there, a warm, strengthening present behind Chris' back.
At last it was done and Chris stood before the crosses again. "I just wanted you two to know I will never forget you. And that although the pain of missing you two will always be there, I have a life again and somehow a new family. I thought it important to tell you that, I think you would want to know it", he whispered.
Chris looked at Vin, waiting so patiently a few steps back. He looked back at the graves. And then he smiled, something he found himself do more often these days. "I love you both, always will", he stated. Then he looked at Vin, tears coming to his eyes again. But it was for a grieve that was no longer soul shattering, for a grieve he finally had given a place in his life in a way he could live with. Vin looked back and in his eyes Chris saw the compassion, the understanding he had also seen in the eyes of his other five friends when he and Vin rode off from Four Corners. A compassion and understanding he would see again when he and Vin came back.
"Let's go, Vin. Let's go home."
THE END